As my countdown to leaving for Haiti (for the first but not last time) draws to a close, I have so many things I am reflecting upon. Currently, I am finishing packing and am realizing that I have so much "stuff" but NEED so little of it. I don't need 15 skirts or 20 shirts or 10 pairs of pants. That's a luxury that so many people around the world don't have. I have to ask why I have so much. Is it because I expect to find happiness in the amount of stuff I have? God's been speaking to me about simplifying my life, but I still have far to go.

Yesterday, I had lunch with the other team members and was so thankful we got to know each other better- each one has so much to contribute to this trip. We heard from Elise, our trip leader, that the airline we were supposed to take from Port-au-Prince to Port-de-Paix has closed down. They are looking into other options, possibly another airline or a 6 hour bus ride. In the past I would have been anxious or worried about the changes, but God has brought me to a place of complete peace knowing life with Him is an adventure. I'm learning to enjoy the adventure. This won't be the only thing that seems to go "wrong", but each time I'll remind myself that He's in complete control and look for the blessings in disguise. (And hey, with a bus trip we get to see a lot more of Haiti!)

In church the sermon was about the tension between passion and patience. There must be a balance between our zeal for what God has called us to (our life's purpose) and not being so overbearing that we push others away. I have a passion for missions, especially Haiti, but God may ask me to quietly wait for His perfect timing to be revealed.

At youth group I was able to explain to the teens where I was going to be the next several weeks- Haiti then New Mexico- and they had a time of prayer for me. It was a blessing to hear the teens pray for our safety and the ways God is going to use us. I believe many of these youth are catching the vision. I see how God is allowing me to connect with many of them and how much I'm going to miss them in the weeks I'm gone. 

Also yesterday I had the privilege to talk with a couple who have been so inspirational to me. The Lord has led Mark and Jen Bettinger and their three children to move to Africa this year. They have sold or given away most of their belongings (including their house). They are a living example of what it truly means to surrender everything to God. They are living transparent lives, acknowledging it is not always easy but totally worth it. It's a sacrifice on many levels, but with overwhelming rewards. I can't wait to see how God uses them to do amazing things!

So, in 3 days I will take the next step He has shown me and trust Him to open or close doors along the way.

Help Me Find It- Sidewalk Prophets
(partial lyrics)

 
I don't know where to go from here 
It all used to seem so clear  
I'm finding I can't do this on my own
As long as I know that You are near 
I'm done fighting, I'm finally letting go
I will trust in You  
You've never failed before.

If there's a road I should walk 
Help me find it, if I need to be still  
Give me peace for the moment  
Whatever Your will, whatever Your will
Can you help me find it? Can you help me find it?
I'm giving You fear and You give faith
I'm giving you doubt, You give me grace  
For every step I've never been alone.